Why Am I So Angry at My Girlfriend? And What Can I Do About It?

That is a good question. "Why am I so angry at my girlfriend?" Rest assured you are not the only man asking it.

And good on ya for wondering what you can do about it rather than just deciding you always have to be alone or angry. It's smart of you to look around for some relationship help for men.

This is not deep, detailed clinical advice. It's just a simple, effective technique I learned when I did workshops with men in prison. And when it comes to accepting and expressing emotions, almost all of us men are in a sort of prison, aren't we?

It's quite possible that you're angry because anger pushed right past what you were really feeling.

Your real emotions, your deeper emotions, your primary emotions might need some help. They might need some confidence and encouragement before they can take the stage, stand at the mic, smile at the audience (your girlfriend) and speak in a way that gets your point across in a way your audience can hear.

An easy technique for building that confidence and giving yourself that encouragement is the "I feel..." statement.

This video is a primer on that technique. You can use "I feel" statements to guide, develop and improve your ability to truly, calmly, confidently say what you really feel, what you really want and what you really need to say.

Plus, it gives your girlfriend a good chance at being able to hear you and think about what you're saying rather than being defensive and trying to turn your problem around so it becomes just another problem that's all about her, what she wants and needs, and what a bad boyfriend you are.

"I feel" statements in relationships won't always help you get your way. And that's fine because you shouldn't always get your way. But the technique will help you at least get your problem on the relationship agenda for full and complete, perhaps ongoing, discussion.

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